So what are five positives about your past week?
Go ahead take a moment to write them down or at least think about them.
I can wait……
Okay, this week I’d like to tell you a story. It’s one I’ve been telling for many years. So many that I forget who actually told it to me. You’ll see the relevance to you shortly.
There once was a guy who loved his girlfriend’s meatloaf. He asked if he could watch her make it one Sunday and of course she said sure.
She started by getting the ground meat and mixing in various spices and herbs and other ingredients. She molded it into the typical shape of a meatloaf and just before she put it in the pan to go into the oven, she chopped off a small section from each end. The guy became curious and surprised and asked her why she cut off both ends. She replied that’s the way my mom always did it.
The next Sunday they go to watch mom make the meatloaf. Mom started by getting the ground meat and mixing in various spices and herbs and other ingredients. She molded it into the typical shape of a meatloaf and just before she put it in the pan to go into the oven, she chopped off a small section from each end. The guy once again became curious and asked the mom why she cut off both ends. The mom replied, that’s how my mom made meatloaf.
The following Sunday they visited with grandmom to watch her make the meatloaf. Grandmom started by getting the ground meat and mixing in various spices and herbs and other ingredients. She molded it into the typical shape of a meatloaf and just as she was about to cut off both ends, the guy says, “Excuse me! Why are you cutting off the end?” The grandmom replied and said, “My pan is only so big!”
As kids we learn from various people and experiences. Through each one we develop our own interpretation and understanding. This is perfectly normal. As human beings we strive to make sense of our world. That’s important to do. Unfortunately, our perceptions and understandings are not always accurate and do not apply in all settings and situations. For example, running as a way to escape something you are afraid of. If someone is chasing you, it might be a good idea to run away. If you are in public where others “might be” evaluating you, however, does not necessarily mean that you need to run. If we earn a ‘B’ on an exam and someone says, why didn’t you get a ‘A’, we might interpret that as not being good enough. If similar situations occur often enough, we might grow up to believe we will “never be good enough”.
The point is, is that what we learn to believe about the world, others and even ourselves does not always hold true when we get older. As we become adults, we gain more power. We gain the power to choose things like who we spend time with and who we allow to spend time with us. We can choose what we do or don’t do. These things change and so can our beliefs about the world, others, and ourselves. We have the power to evaluate our beliefs and decide which ones we still agree with and which we want to change. If we just keep believing because, “it’s what I’ve always believed”, you might be losing out on 1/4 of the meatloaf!
~ Dr. Lou